i.     ii.     iii.    iv.    v.    t.  —   vii.    viii.

I wonder how many little movements in bed with someone are enough to remind your sleeping bodies that they’re apart, and I wonder how many times our bodies just naturally feel cold and unoccupied and unheld so they curl around the other unconsciously to remind one another that they’re still here and they still want every part of you, even when they’re asleep.

boob   ramblins  

i wanna take kyle to sunset cliffs because it’s suppose to be the prettiest spot in sandiego to go and watch da sunset and i wanna plan this all out so i can drive and take him and not tell him where we’re goin and leave just in time to get there a half hour before sunset and we can sit there and just be and appreciate that we’re both there and not across the country from one another and can i just list the things i appreciate even just being here only two days please

he likes sleeping back to back and his shoulders are so broad and his back is always so cuddly and warm and a lot of the times he’ll sleepy whine out something like “babe hold me” if he doesn’t wanna turn around or is tired of laying on one side and the other night i had a bad dream and so he cuddled into me tighter than ever and i don’t even know where our limbs separated and this morning before he left for duty he gave me at least 8 kisses on my cheek and i miss him already and it’s the best feeling in the world to let him go and know that in a few hours he can come home to be and i can be here for him to come back to, and i think it’s precious that when we’re falling asleep he moves a lot whether it’s his foot or his shoulder shifts or his hands in mine his fingers just flex n make lil moves randomly and he has the best hands i’ve ever seen and i feel like not many appreciate such little things like that but i can’t get over them and i’ll just watch him walk around the room and just have to blurt out how handsome and good lookin he is and sometimes i just want to kiss for 20 minutes straight and do nothing but and his lips taste like brown sugar because we got him lip scrub from lush and we hold pinkies or ring fingers when we’re out and he is just so goofy all the time and can make me go from sleepy to moody within seconds and i can wake him up whenever i want kisses or lovin or for him to cuddle me/me to cuddle him and i love the random times we’re out and he just calls me baby so casually since we usually just say babe or boob and i don’t remember the last time i even said his name other then when we’re having a serious conversation and i am just so happy and so loved and so lovey and just laying next to him falling asleep in bed and tracing the muscles in his back lets me know that i’m safe and i’m here and he’s here and we’re both here and at least for now we’re not going anywhere

boob   ramblins  

the most horrifying pain i can imagine is sitting down at a table barefoot and someone comes to pull their chair in and sits down with the leg right on your toes ok im dead

I am standing on a bench outside of the airport waiting for Kyle to find me and I am so nervous and anxious and excited and my fingers are shaking WHY AM I THE MOST EMOTIONAL PERSON ALIVE

boob   ramblins  

I burrow into my down blankets and put my fan on as high as it goes and block out every piece of light in my room, and when I close my eyes I’m three floors up with an aging air conditioning unit plastered in one of my bedroom windows. The other open to a deep, talkative city street. Drunken couples outbursts and dogs on fire escapes and the occasional lonely night driver to keep me company. The showers running and all Ill remember in the morning is brief and fuzzy glimpses of him and scents of him and tongue neck temple thigh ankle shoulder and the feel and taste and warmth of his clean skin pulling at mine. And we sleep. Home.

Me and my momma both walked out of our rooms at exactly the same time because we can’t sleep so now were both sitting in the living room eating hotdogs and watching love it or list it. Like mommy like daughter.

sometimes when i get really mad i just wanna annihilate myself with alcohol because its the best way to say fuck you without actually saying it and its the best way to feel like you’re saying fuck you when you’re too nice to say it and it’s the best way to feel like you’re drowning yourself in pride and self-importance when really you’re swallowing down your weakness piece by piece because we all know you can’t stick up for yourself, even if he laid a hand on you

i’m watching gossip girl bc fuck you thats y 

elena actually just burned her house down

and jeremys body was still inside

she actually burned it

this show is killing me i feel like a whole other chapter just unraveled oh my god i can’t take it

I think the people that read and devour mostly the same novels undoubtedly would be incredible friends.

Why do movies like safe haven make your life feel so insignificant and inexperienced come on fuck this I’m moving to Southport

I like tiny undies and my babe’s t shirts that cover just to my butt and walking around through my dark house on my tippy toes and drinking two mugs of cocoa because i can’t decide between raspberry and mint and siting on counters and cold toes and kisses from my boy and peanut butter toast with bananas and reading until my eyes start drooping but not going to bed just turning on gossip girl instead and i like vanilla lush powder and clean sheets and shower fresh skin and chuck bass and chuck bass

To anyone that struggles with anxiety, or depression, or episodes: you are not a burden, and an honest friend would never think so. Fuck anyone who makes you feel small because of it. You have lived this far every day with it, and you’re the strongest person there is because of it. Never forget that.

i am getting so nervous with vampire diaries because i feel like it is getting so close to the end of the season and i dread the end of the episode when it might say “NEXT WEEK ON THE SEASON FINALE OF VAMPIRE DIARIES” instead of “next thursday on vampire diaries” UGH NO

Klaus and Caroline are so fucking cute FUCK TOO MUCH FEELIN RIGHT NOW